I have meditated, studied, and prayed about the scripture "the power of life and death is in the tongue. Proverbs 18:21" Many times. Words are important to me after all. They tell stories. They can build someone up but they can also tear them down.
I try as a mom to be affirming and loving. I don't always do the best job. My tongue can get away from me and I can say something harsh. Then your child repeats it back to you. And oh, it stings. Stings deep. You can only imagine how their little heart must have felt.
As a wife, you can say something that cuts straight to the quick. Sometimes unintentional, or worse completely intentional. Because sometimes we want to make a point, darn it! Then you see the look in their eye. Your words have hit the mark. That look hits the mark in you. You feel ashamed that you hurt the one you are supposed to cherish the most in this world.
It says over and over in the Bible that words matter. Words created matter. God spoke into existence. God spoke and it was there. So where do we get this horrible notion that words cannot hurt me?
Pride, ego, and bitterness are the roots of this lie the world projects onto children. Granted I don't think we should be offended or sensitive. We should measure the words that come to us from the source. But more on that later.
As parents we teach kids to say kind things to one another. We want to edify them as well as them edify others. I have been particularly focused on speaking life giving words over my children, home, and spouse. Those things that we release in spoken word, will be in existence where you are.
Then I saw a meme. I love memes, funny, profound, silly, inspirational. Any kind really. This one was convicting to the core!
If the words you spoke appeared on your skin... Would you still be beautiful?
Oh my! I can answer honestly, no. Some parts might be, but how often do I say negative things? A lot! About myself, about annoyances, about anything really.
"From the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. Matthew 12:34" For real!
So how do we fix this? It's not just about choosing your words, it's about transformation from the inside out. That comes by agreeing with God's word.
I know people will come along and say ugly things to me, my children, my husband. The words may attempt to pierce us and they may hurt us, but we need not be wounded by it. We need to always consider our source. Not the source of the words being spoken to or over us. Our source of identity. What does God say about you? If what is being said doesn't line up with His opinion of us, then we can lovingly say I choose truth and move on.
When we are in agreement with who God says we are, we speak with honor and lovingly to those around us. Because who wants to act unbecomingly when walking in their identity in Christ. You are His image bearer.
At the end of the day, do I want to build people up? Do I want to speak life over them? Do I want to share what God says about them? Absolutely! Because words matter, choose them wisely.
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